Here comes the night.What do I mean by that?In a minute.
I am fully aware that I have not been here for quite some time. At one point I was of the opinion that the more I was here, at least on some level, the better it was for both you gentle reader, and for me to explain the ins and outs of my creative life. Please bear in mind that I've never been one to spill my guts in a sort of electronic frenzy that seems so common these days. So, for the large part, I've refrained from what I see as a kind of orgy of self flagellation. But, trust me it hasn't been a bowl of cherries. Several months ago I came very, very close to being hospitalized for a bad reaction to anti biotics,[runs in the family.] and a newly developed ulcer. This was just literally the day before I was scheduled to appear at C2E2 in Chicago. It's taken months of rest and medication to get back some semblance of myself. Needless to say I haven't been exactly Mr. fireball in the studio.
OH, then there is "Fracture of the Universal Boy" to contend with. From my perspective, the damn thing has eaten me alive for years now. That's no exaggeration. I'm not indulging in artistic bullshit here, I meant every word I just wrote. I've barely been able to draw since I finished it.
If and until it is actually published I simply won't be the same. I can't move on and I absolutely can not go back. And thee is one thing that will utterly kill an artists work than not going forward. Believe me when I say, I am really ready to move on and explore new ideas, concepts and ways of making art. This brings me to the edge of San Diego. I WILL BE THERE. "Boy" will be for sale in November. PERIOD. Please come see me, Attend the panel where I plan to remove the "ME" on stage and "YOU" down there where I deliver witty bon mots from my ivory tower.
Frankly I don't have one. Never liked the idea. I'm just a working guy that sees the world a little differently than you. That's my job, and mostly I've been petty lucky in that I get paid to do it. Not great pay by any means but usually enough to get by. Ok, some I made the decision to not be a wage slave to a essentially mindless system that takes more than they give and makes you believe it's good for you. My cross to bear ok? I knew how hard it would be, and how risky it was, but to my mind it was a better choice than being used like an Kleenex and disposed of by the small, nasty gods of pop culture. Right here I want to publicly thank Mr. Ryan Graff and Mr. Thomas Negovan for the work, the belief and the patience to help me shepard this book home. They both are rare and wonderful men.
I ask you, now, right now, I must now actually plead with you to put your hard earned money down and buy my book. For me, it's a matter of life and death. I am not exaggerating at all. It is all that stands between me, my home and ruin. Come see me in San Diego, get something signed, buy art, talk to me about whatever is on your mind, I will listen. It is my firm, unbending belief that art is at it's best when there is Independence and integrity behind it. Not what's "hot" not what's being sold to you, but something free and possibly dangerous. It's what changes lives, minds and hearts. It has mine.
I will more than likely not be back here until it's all over, but I promise I will be back with a real rundown of the whole deal with evidence and crime scene photo's to back me up. Until that time, two things: wish me luck, as I firmly believe in the power of good will and please understand that however anonymous you feel you are, I value you and truly appreciate your support.
Peace,
M.Z.
ps: yeah, i never did explain what i meant by that opening line, or, maybe i did, eh?
m.z.
